‘Young Man’

Censored*: hello guru

Azuka: Hi. How’re you doing today?

Censored*: cool. u?

Azuka: I’m surviving.

Azuka: Was there a question you wanted to ask me?

Censored*: not really. i just wanted to say tanx for your help the other day

Azuka: It’s nothing.

Censored*: u gave me your blog addy a while ago. man, youve got talent!

Azuka: 😳

Censored*: your so young! i cant belive your just 18

Censored*: r u sure your 18?

Azuka: Well, I am. Why?

Censored*: u dont talk like it

Censored*: i thot i have been talking to a grown-up. u small boy!

I can’t understand the way people suddenly become superior when they discover my age. Telling me I’m younger than you thought I was strokes my ego, but becoming condescending will tick me off — badly…

For some reason, I’ve always been the youngest among my peers everywhere I go, I’ve been getting these subtle remarks since I was little — but they never fail to annoy me every time someone makes them.

What’s wrong with being young? Why do people suddenly decide that your age determines how they communicate with you? Why do people who’re just 23 or 26 decide there’s some God-given superiority because of the age difference?

I don’t know if it’s unconscious, but I’ve seen it in a few of my blogger friends. For the love of all things sacred, I’m a person. Do not talk down to me like a child — and if you know anything about children, you don’t talk down to them (for example asking telling their parents, “She’s so smart. How old is she?” when the child can very well answer for herself).

That’s it. I just thought I’d put this across.

Comments

  1. Boso says:

    Hey, don’t listen to anyone……they’re just jealous, simple and short.

  2. I feel you on this one… I mean I’m not as young as you are… but a lot of times people act that way… usually when i speak about ‘intelligent’ stuff or write certain things… a lot of peoples attitudes usually change when they find out i’m younger.. i mean i’m 21 now so its not as bad.. but last year… two years ago… man it was bad.. i mean i used to never tell people my age for the longest time… i’d never lie about it by saying i’m older.. i’d just never say cos i love people to judge me for what i have to say.. not how old i am saying it… you’ve probably seen this on my blog many many times.. ican’t have sex cos i’m 20… i can’t talk about sex because i’m 20.. the list goes on.. blah bla blah… i say screw all that.. at the end of the day… do you sweetness

    having said that… I hope that I have never done this to you though(I dont think I have though cos I don’t give out what I won’t take… )… Neways have a great easter sweetie… i know i haven’t been on your blog in the longest.. i’ve been out of it.. you know why… but i’m back sha so bring on the gist… overwhelmed dey hia!!!

  3. i hear ya, but nonetheless, there is a certain experience that usually goes with age, and can be related to age-dependent things, such as education, etc…. your point has truth, of course, but not universally…..

  4. Biodun says:

    I am so guilty of doing that alot in general. I promise to work on stopping that habit of mine n I guess I never see things the other way around. Pele

  5. I feel you. However, this won’t stop. It’s like asking for world peace. You need to get used to it.

    Pele. BTW, If I ever step on your toes this way (thogh I seriously doubt it), please draw my attention to it.

  6. idemili says:

    I feel you on this one. It was sort of a relief to be put in with undergrads in my hostel during my PG degree as I was the oldest there [barely. By a year, same as 3 others. Still meant a lot]”What? You’re 21? Are you sure you’re on the right programme?” [Yes, bitch. Aren’t you ashamed of yourself now? You’re 10 years older and we’re on the same course] – that it was a relief not to have to deal with it when I got home.

    It can be a curse being the youngest and like you I have always been.

    That being said, I just want to spoil you now and not in the way you think.

    Ever got THAT reaction? *wink*

  7. c0dec says:

    c’man sharaap there! small boy! πŸ™‚

  8. Azuka says:

    Boso
    God knows I’ve tried. Sometimes it gets out of hand.

    Overwhelmed
    Nah, you haven’t πŸ˜‰

    Nikita
    Put it down to ego, but I like thinking the non-universal part doesn’t apply to me. Sorry about last night — I’m on a crazy schedule at the moment and had to run to bed. I thought I’d say hi and spend a minute or two.

    Biodun
    Ha ha. I don’t think you’re one of the culprits.

    In my head and around
    πŸ˜† at asking for world peace. I usually ignore it, but at certain times the aggravation is intense.

    Idemili
    Thanks. Er, the last part of your comment was confusing. Are you asking two questions or one?

    c0dec
    Hmmm. 😑

  9. Keshi says:

    I guess age is just a number…what matters is if ur young at heart. R u Azuka? πŸ™‚

    Keshi.

  10. Afropinay says:

    Like In & Around said, you’ll become numb to such subtle remarks at a particular phase that you won’t even care..and just another reminder, whenever you hear such remakrs, just murmur to yourself “I love me”, smile, and life goes on..:)

    How u been? ive been on bidding wars, its so addictive.

  11. Ejura says:

    Don’t let it get to you Azuka cos it’s not going to stop.It can be annoying though.
    I’m in my mid twenties but most folk think I am say 19 cos of the way I look.Some even treat me like a child.
    There was this man at my nysc camp who called me one day and gave me “200 naira for yoghurt” cos I looked too young.
    It annoys me sometimes but these days I’m learning to enjoy the privileges it affords me!I’ve met 25 year olds trapped in the bodies of 6 year olds!Age is only a number.

  12. nyemoni says:

    Fraid tis not going to stop sir… Methinks everyone does it once in a while…don’t get offended by it, tale it as a compliment..age aint nothing but a number..

  13. snazzy says:

    what you are talking about is generally catharsis by being condescending. Whether you are young, black, female (or male in a woman’s rights argument), foreign take your pick, someone will always try to use it to discount what you are saying or at least to make themselves feel better. People can’t help the need to feel superior in one respect or another whether it is warranted or not. I actually used to take it as a compliment, that that is the best they can come up with. Anyway, you know that by writing this, you are never allowed to be ageist. EVER! peace.

  14. mari says:

    hey dont let it get to ya. You have to understand that people find it shocking. Not in a bad way but in an unbelievable way or more like an amazement. I don’t think they mean to sound or be condescending or anything like that.(geez, I feel like am blabbering) Hope you get what am trying to say. Going back to work now!

  15. Calabar Gal says:

    Ha ha. True!! We just cant help it. (smile)

  16. Vickii says:

    You’re 18??? Sorry if I sound surprised but you definitely don’t come across like you’re 18 … in a good way. Your writing is really great and would be if you were 25 or 35 so it’s all the more amazing that you’re 18.

    Lol, we older people are just jealous that we’re not young anymore that’s why we try and pretend that we’ve got so much more life experience to show for the extra numbers.

  17. idemili says:

    It doesn’t matter, Azuka. Never mind. LOL

  18. Azuka says:

    Keshi
    Sure, I am!

    Afropinay
    Bidding wars? What’re those? We haven’t talked in a while. Just write down all your sins on paper before the monk shows up.

    EjuraWow! It’s good to look young but after a point… That’s why I leave my beard, or at least a part of it. Going clean-shaven, most people would think I’m just a 6ft 1 baby.

    Nyemoni
    When it’s so obvously not meant like a compliment, it gets doubly annoying.

    Snazzy
    You know I’m actually translating this to Spanish and back in the hope that all the big words wil be broken downduring the reversal πŸ˜†

    Calabar Gal
    Just venting…

    Mari
    Lol and thanks. Still planning on becoming a DBA? πŸ˜‰

    Vickii
    Wow, I thought you knew!

    Idemili
    It matters oh! Now I’m as curious as can be!

  19. idemili says:

    You know what they said about curiosity. Killed the cat. No seriously, forget it. I was being a bit of a perv. Looks like Simply Gorgeous’ words have come true!

  20. Akin aworan says:

    Personally I am awed when anyone younger does something impressive and that tends to spur me on. However, you’re always going to have people like the dude giving shakara. Just keep on being yourself.

  21. chidi says:

    i get what you mean because i get this all the time as well. For me i have 2 problems. I’m always the youngest wherever i go and i’m always the tallest person or the tallest female. I’m 6ft so when people ask me my age, i tell them & they are like oh my gawd!! are you sure?? i’m like yes, and they are like to everyone that is beside them “can you beleive that she is just -yrs? and she is so tall? i think they are feeding her on fertilizer in her house. people would see her and think she’s a grown uo but she is just a child”. The worst thing is mom makes sure she tells everyone my age everywhere i go wit her and i ge this over and over again. it is annoying!

  22. Azuka says:

    Idemili
    Chai. This is what’s called pulling the teaser:lol:

    Akin
    Thanks

    Chidi
    Damn, I know that feeling! I’ve always been the same height as my elder brother [he’s 3 years older than I am but people we met called us ‘Ejime’ — twins]. When I was 12, I shot up, leaving him behind.

    I’m 6ft 1 now but before I left, everywhere we went, my elder brother made sure to tell everyone ‘he’s my younger brother’ and the age question inevitably came up.

  23. you are only 18? for real? just joking well.. a child that washes his hands well eats with the elders..

  24. Jem says:

    You’re smart and you’re unique and that is what matters … age is just a number!

  25. What??!?!!??

    You mean you’re just eighteen, and I’ve been wasting my valuable time talking to you, when I thought you were at least double your age? Don’t you know that all people below the age of forty are still immature and are incapable of forming a coherent opinion? You only have to look at the knowledge, wisdom and understanding shown by our Elders who have taken our country Nigeria to such great heights on account of their great age.

    OK, I’m done with you – as it is, I’ve put my reputation in danger by talking to someone as young as you. Now go out and buy some extra years to add to your age, and I don’t want to see you again until you’ve done that!

  26. Azuka says:

    IjeomaObuIheoma
    Thanks.

    Jem
    True, my sister.

    Atala Wala Wala
    Well done. πŸ˜†

  27. CNG says:

    you are 18 , gosh you are young!!
    ok sorry

    so mature for someone so young

  28. amaraeee says:

    18 and so what?

    Okay…do not let them put you down…when anyone says again they cannot believe how young/old you are or they thought you were older…tell them to forget the number and deal with the “you” that they feel and see

  29. Nosa says:

    i still get shit because i just turned 17…

  30. simplycider says:

    it’s mostly sub-conscious, Azuka (at least so I think)

  31. Azuka says:

    CNG
    Ha ha. It’s okay.

    AmaraEee
    Thanks.

    Nosa
    That’s one of the reasons I don’t like telling people my age.

    SimplyCider
    I know. Sometimes it gets unbearable.

  32. kiki says:

    OH DEAR GOD!! i cant believe your 18, i’m 18 but your wisdom and eloquence surpasses mine by far(truth be told, i feel like a dummy now!).

  33. wole says:

    Hey my brother

    Guess im the one that almost didnt make ur blog heaven, just stumbled on it like i did all the other blogs i know. Anyway, i hav been in your shoes all my life very much older, but always had to add to my age back then in school, had 3 relationships then and they were all really older than i was. Still find my self in the mix but now what i know takes care of the age suckers. Good skillz.

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